i will punch

i will punch
your nose into your eyes
the testosterone flies
it’s a set of torrid lies
that we decry

i will best
the worst thoughts in my mind
purge them from all crime
set their hearts afire
and then whisper:

“i will puuuuuuuuunch”

“you look so angry”
well, duh

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parple smizmar window pane (open the window Herple)


peering down a great canyon of valleys
Mrs. Herple Purple sits among us
she is upset
her chair is upended
tumbling down the aisle to the podium
there is a speech to be given
a ghost of a past
a robot of a villain
a cheech of a chong

“open the window Herple”

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a collection of older songs

just for you, i’ve compiled a bunch of stuff that has been sitting around (like, literally, these songs have been on chairs) since about 2006.

here’s a video for one of the tracks. i found this band of otters who played and danced and singed all night long:

here’s the rest of the album, which can be found at ieatpants.bandcamp.com

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if you like to gamble, i tell you i’m your man

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